coffee: drug of choice

As a newly sober alcoholic, the go-to legal stimulant will be the caffeinated beverage.  Coffee how I love thee.  You wake me up in the morning, you keep me up at night.  You give me reason to increase my anti-anxiety medication.  Starbucks was supplying this drink to me on weekly basis, but since the advent of Dunkin Donuts to our town, I have options.  Coffee can allow one to , as they say, “do stupid things faster, with more efficiency” . I get a rush at work and take on all the projects.  I get  super-powers at home that grant me the ability to vacuum floors, fold laundry, load the dishwasher and maybe…(but not likely) clean a bathroom?  How miraculous this warm cup of java for any person who struggles to find the motivation, like I do, to drag yourself sleepily from your bed at 6 AM!   Such a gift the Mayans (or was it the Incas) gave us in the form of cocoa plant seeds, crushed and then filtered thru hot water.

Imagine life without caffeine, you AA member,  you new mother, you college student, workaholic, creepy wannabe writer sitting alone in the coffee shop trying too hard to look interesting and mysterious on your laptop. Oh and yes..even the intern (what would you deliver your tyrant superiors when condescendingly told, “Retrieve my coffee , you peasant!)

I cannot conceive of a world without my coffee.  It doesn’t exist.  If the zombie apocalypse that everyone keeps talking about actually comes to pass, and coffee machines no longer work for lack of electricity I already have the solution.  During our hurricane, when the power was out for a week…I rigged a rather clever coffee maker out of paper towels,rubber bands and hot water.   It was genius.  During this end- of -the world scenario I will not be without!  I can do it all.  Run from zombies, faster, with my coffee cup in hand.