“Gotta go thru hell before you get to heaven”

Steve Miller Band, you were so right. Such is life. Change (growth) demands a certain level of personal misery prior to its conception. This, my friends, is why we resist it so fiercely. Deny it. But I’m in the mood to bend and break and become something better. Hell? I feel the heat occasionally. Well most every day. But I’m finding the power of prayer (peace & serenity) extinguishes the flames. I must learn how to pray “specifically” as AA tells me. Today I pray my journey thru hell is graced by a fire extinguisher of astonishing capacity to blow back the flame. The flames how they feed off my fears, weaknesses and flaws. Ignited by people, places and things my hell is ever present. If I choose it to be. I try very hard to be a good lil firefighter. Some days I’m strong, climbing ladders and kicking ass. But most days I’m unsure, feeling the heat off the door, looking for smoke. My prayer is this: let me be strong enough to climb ladders, hold back the flame. Because the light on the other side of the smoke and flame is wondrous. I seek thee out, sweet heaven. Make me a believer of miracles. There is no hell that is not man-made.
firelady

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7 thoughts on ““Gotta go thru hell before you get to heaven”

  1. I love your prayer. What stood out to me was “There is no hell that is not man-made”. Amen to that. I think you and I are a lot alike and it doesn’t surprise me. We do have something in common 🙂

      1. The disease of alcoholism. I can relate to you. I like what you write. Thank you for sharing your thoughts. You make me remember what it was like when I finally pulled my head out of the sand.

      2. Thanks. That’s one reason I attend meetings…to be reminded of the pain

        Sent from my iPhone

  2. You are much loved! The longer I live, the more I believe, hell is here..although, not always our creation! Heaven will be sweet. I am forever your faithful supporter & loving mom ❤ we just have to survive to become as beautiful glass &/or a polished vessel"
    Much love,
    Mom

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