In this morning’s reading of the “Just for Today” daily meditations, something bothers me. It says our sobriety is its own reward. That we addicts do not need to go around boasting of our recovery, bragging of how “sober” we are. I get it. Pride comes before the fall. But my problem with this thought is exactly this “We are as sick as our secrets” Another conundrum of AA. How should we live? Hiding our addiction and disease? No, not me. I’m too grateful for my escape from hell and into the light of recovery that to not speak of it is a sin. I’m an alcoholic. And the only time I get to say that with any amount of regard is in a meeting with other alcoholics? I’m not buying. I want to shout it from the rooftops that I’m clean and sober. But that sort of proclamation is considered boastful, prideful in the circles of AA. I guess what I have is a love/hate relationship with the program. My own recovery is not bound to the limits, rules (spoken or unspoken) of a cult-like group. Nonetheless I find solace in its members, in its rituals and traditions, much like a daily meditation. A sober mind is a terrible thing to keep secret. The world needs to know of us. How we found our higher power, how we stay humble, how we express our gratitude…how we maintain our sobriety. These are not gems to hide but treasures to be shared. I know AA is a program of attraction, but how many souls do we attract by remaining silent in our workplace, our families and friendships, our community outside of AA? I am humbled but I am not any less of an advocate for the prevention of substance abuse because of my sobriety. In fact, more so today. I think I will make some tshirts with the slogan ,”Sober and Loving it!” or “I am High on my Higher Power”….ask me how.